Finding peace in the storm

Yesterday was one of those days where I could feel myself losing my patience before it snapped.

There were multiple hurdles crossed: a few meltdowns, a missed nap, an aversion to any food presented. I could feel it all bubbling over with stress and anxiety, when I told myself: aren’t these the times my daughter needs me to be strong the most? So I decided to allow the unknown to unfold, and took us and our dog into the yard to play while I wrote.

It was a glorious, hour-long respite, everyone enjoying the sunshine on a late spring afternoon. I wish I could say I didn’t lose my patience at some point.

I noticed Lainey was walking (barefoot) where there could be poison ivy. I felt overwhelmed in the moment, with the compound of everything else that occurred today, and needed a few minutes to ground myself. I am grateful that I have the most supportive husband who will always help, especially when I’m not at my best (who proceeded to give her a bath).

As I write this - a form of therapy and reflection for me - I want to allow myself to rejoice in the lovely moments that yesterday brought.

But I write this to my fellow mothers and parents: you are not alone during hard moments.

I am giving myself grace and know I am learning and growing as a mother, every day. We are human. We are here to learn.

We can only do better each day. Sending light and love, always.